Under Pressure!

Rawr, I need to blog!

I want to make videos. I do. But...schoooool. Grr. I haaaate this. I have two and a half more weeks. The question right now is, can I make it?

Here's the deal: I graduated with my AA last December. Since I have no idea what I want to get by BA in, and since I'm COMPLETELY SICK OF ALL THINGS SCHOOL-RELATED, I decided to take some time off...after one more semester. I, mean, overall I'm glad I did it. I got to finish Music-and-Aural Theory 4, and I got to do Music Composition 2. But I've had a bad case of apathy all semester. Since Spring Break, it's been about ten times worse.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am really NOT an apathetic person. Actually, you can probably get that from just watching my videos and reading my blog. I'm a hot-or-cold kind of person. If I love something, I throw myself into it. If I don't like it, I don't bother. I have a bad temper, but I can be over it in a matter on minutes. I actually usually like school. I'm a nerd, so I love to learn, and generally school is a fairly sociable and enjoyable time for me. But I've been in college for almost four years now, since I started dual-enrolling when I was 15, and I can't take it anymore. I've got extreme Senioritis, and I'm a first-semester Junior. I'm taking at least a year (maybe more) off after this semester, but I've been so overcome by this uncharacteristic apathy that I have a lot to get done in the next two weeks before I leave. Also, I don't like feeling apathetic! It's not me, and it makes me uncomfortable and restless and UGH, I just can't stand it!

To top it all off, I'm having an amazing time in my band, and I just want to focus on that. I'm site manager, which makes me in charge of editing and updating our myspace and youtube, and sending and replying to emails. I also have a fair number of partially-written songs that need to be finished and arranged before we record them, which we need to do soon if we want to release an album anytime this summer. We're also hoping to travel sometime this year, and we're trying really hard to get that to work out. We don't have any money, and we're going to start doing live gigs soon, but we need to rehearse pretty hard and none of us have time. AND Rachel and I are starting a side project that is yet to be announced, but will be AMAZING if we can only do it, which I'm not sure if we can, and it's FREAKING ME OOOOOUT!!!

I'd normally apologize for that sort of outburst, but this is my own freaking blog and I can freak out and stress and whine as much as I freaking want.

I need encouragement.

No, I need an out.

See you tomorrow.
Emily.